Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Proposals and Dry Spells

Tonight I will hand in my proposal for a Fine Art Show to be held next Spring. I'm pretty confident it will be accepted; it's a win-win situation for them: I do the work, they get the benefit. This is the second time I've organized a show like this, the last one being in the early eighties, so it's been a while since I actually did one. I wonder if there was a reason I didn't organize a show for over 20 years? Lucky for me I have MMF (menopausal memory failure) so I am going into this endeavor absolutely free of any bad past experiences. And I'm sure there are some.

I have entered a no-create zone. Something like the twilight zone, without Rod Serling. Last night I was all ready to go into the studio and start throwing paint on canvas, but life threw another curve ball, this one being in the form of a 3-year-old granddaughter who needed outside playtime and then a bath. I don't know about you, but my ability to say "no" to a 3-year-old ended when my own kids grew up. Now the grandkid says pleeeeeeeeeease and I follow blindly, unwilling and unable to refuse her requests. Maybe it has something to do with time flying by, going faster and faster the older I get. I give up. So anyway, the gist of it is, still no new work in the studio, although even I have to admit, it's been quite a long dry spell. So my goal for this week is to create one small study. Not even going to say a real painting. Because I can feel myself sliding into a complacent state of mind, and that spells doom for me. I have to be in a state of agitation, of chaos, of just-this-side-of-panic to produce in volume. Because easy and relaxed kills my Muse. Nothing inspires me more than to be under pressure, and even self-induced pressure can work. The hardest stroke of the brush is the first one, and I have 2 or 3 paintings that are begging to be finished, as well. One is a very loose portrait of my daughter and granddaughter at the beach. Remember how I said I don't do portraits? Well, this is not a portrait, per se, sort of an impressionistic rendering. But it's not finished. So maybe instead of starting a new one, I should work on that. The hard part is done on that one, already blocked in and everything. Okay, I've talked myself into it. After work, after proposal giving, I'm going to go take another look at the beach portrait and maybe even mix some paint. Pray for me, that nothing else gets in line in front of the studio tonight!

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